Unchaahi: against Female Foeticide in India

Friday, May 16, 2008

Social Security System an answer for dowry?

As mentioned in my previous post, changing mindset and implementing laws are two solutions that activists and social scientists of India are suggesting. However, I have read 'social security system' being hinted as a solution in some papers as well. I've always been a strong supporter of a social security system due to various other reasons (example: to assist the unorganized sector like domestic help) but could the same support system also help girls being valued?

My thoughts were further strengthened by a wonderful article written by Janet Bagnell for The Montreal Gazette. She has written about a documentary that a Quebec filmaker Karina Marceau has made on Sex Selective Abortions in India. The documentary is an hour long and is available for purchase on http://www.pvpmonde.ca/. Janet writes:
Dowries are the main reason behind sex-selective abortions, said Marceau. The average dowry, she said, is about five times the average annual salary in India. In Canada, a comparable dowry would cost $300,000.

India's economic miracle is making the dowry problem worse. As society becomes richer, the demands increase. Poor families are crippled by the debts they have to undertake to find husbands for their daughter.

What are missing in India are public pensions, old-age security, fully subsidized health care and education, the speakers said. Without these public supports, the son remains his parents' sole means of long-term support. Without public supports, raising a daughter is, as an Indian proverb puts it, like watering the neighbour's garden - to no point. With pressure increasing on Indian families to have only two children, too many families want only boys.

That's the recurring thought process that we keep hearing of, isn't it? Daughters being the 'paraaya dhan' (someone else's wealth) don't deserve to be wasted money on. Therefore, it's better that they are not even born.

I wouldn't say that dowry is the ONLY culprit but it most definitely is one of the main culprits. Dowry needs to be done away with but, obviously, it's only getting worse. Ostentatiousness is only increasing manifold with the increase of wealth inflow. I recently had a conversation about dowry with a well educated young man from a small town in Bihar (India) who is now settled in UK. His younger sister, 23, is betrothed to be married soon. Therefore, he is in the process of saving money to help his parents pay dowry for his post-graduate sister. "Shouldn't you be speaking up against it?", I asked him. He responded with a shrug, "That's just the way it is. Never thought of debating it." Owing to his nonchalant response, we had a detailed conversation about the gravity of the situation. He agreed with everything negative I had to say about the dowry system but he still wouldn't be bothered to do anything about it. That's just the way it is for him and that might just the way it will be for his children too. Having said that, I must mention that he's a great guy. Just the kind you would want as a friend, a brother or even a father.

Given such attitude from even the educated and 'good' people goes to show that dowry is to stay. Anti-dowry laws were introduced in 1960s and they have had no effect. Dowry is still going and going strong. As Janet writes, an average of 15,000 Indian women a year are killed over their dowry. Most are burned to death in their kitchens, a method of killing which can be disguised as an accident. My naive assumption based on these facts is that dowry is here to stay for a while at least. With dowry, commodification of women stays too. With commodification, daughters being considered a financial burden is also a must. Why not try and ease this financial burden on parents by not only giving them financial incentives that government has offered to parents with girl children in the past but also introduce a workable social security system which includes 'public pensions, old-age security, fully subsidized health care and education'?

Perhaps that could work as a solution in combination with changing mindset and implementing laws as suggested in the previous post. What do you say?

Related reading:
Dowry increasing?

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8 Comments:

  • Dowry has another flip side as well and that being the rampant misuse of anti-dowry laws. One false complaint can land the whole family in jail and denied bail and ruin the life of in-laws just to settle petty marital discords or to satiate greeds of unscrupulous women. Every year 70, 000 cases of dowry harassment are filed and 98% of them are false as per this study.

    http://www.csrindia.org/Reports&Documents/Seminar%20Report/Research%20-%20498A.pdf

    http://ncrb.nic.in/ADSI2005/atable%202.7.pdf

    http://ncrb.nic.in/ADSI2006/Suicides06.pdf

    These are the suicide statistics of 2005 and 2006 in India which clearly shows that more than double the men are committing suicide than women. And most of the suicides by women have been CONVERTED into DOWRY DEATH cases and in-laws falsely arrested and sent behind bars without an iota of investigation or evidence. Then how do we conclude these women were killed over dowry. Even the h'able SC has termed misuse of 498A as legal terrorism.

    Who do you think is living in a more delirious condition? Even the law itself says every death of married within 7 years of marriage to be assumed as DOWRY DEATH, then how do we believe the statistics based on assumptions to be reliable.

    Before voicing out such ubiquitiously lopsided views, please do some studies. Do not publish blogs to satisfy your genes.

    By Blogger Crusader, At May 17, 2008 at 12:54 PM  

  • Crusader: There was no reason for you to be rude. I don't appreciate your hostile comments but I thank you for them regardless.

    I see no reason for me to answer you either since your comments have nothing to do with the question I raised in my blog post. Thank you for your time and concern. Cheers.

    By Blogger Roop Rai, At May 17, 2008 at 5:25 PM  

  • Anticipatory honor killing is more prevalent in the higher echelon of the society and has nothing to do with dowry

    By Anonymous Anonymous, At May 17, 2008 at 9:41 PM  

  • Anon: huh? dowry is non-prevalent in higher society then? higher the so-called society, the heftier the price tag. plus i did mention that dowry IS one of the many reasons ... not the only reason.

    Thank you.

    By Blogger Roop Rai, At May 17, 2008 at 11:35 PM  

  • Hi Roop,

    I see we have the MRA equivalents like crusader, already posting on your blog. It was a matter of time before we had one of these kinds visiting. To be fair, I would take their grievances more seriously if they were not such blatant mysogynists. Men commit suicide for lots of socio-economic reasons, not because everytime its their wife's who drive them to it as these guys would like to potray.

    Anyway, back to the topic, re- Dowry, I think theres more to it than that. Its the overall expectation thing. You should see the groom's side generally behaves when they come for wedding. My own Husband, was really ticked off by the way some of his family members behaved, they were so demanding. Then the fact that you have to do an elaborate wedding to satisfy everyone's ego. And then the amount of clothes and jwellery that should be given to your own and Groom's family as part of the convention. It all adds up. The system is such that its a drain on finances. Funny thing is, and believe me its very common, even when groom's family proclaim that they don't believe in dowry, there will be snide remarks like "Oh no she didn't bring much", or " We didn't take anything" as if the girl should be oblidged that they were magnanimous enough not to ask. Then why the snide remarks? They can't help it. This expectation thing is in the genes.

    By Blogger Anuradha, At May 18, 2008 at 6:22 AM  

  • I agree, Anu. I am sorry I can't add more value to this discussion at the moment. Grandpa passed away this morning. Not feeling too great. I am sure you understand. :( Thanks.

    By Blogger Roop Rai, At May 18, 2008 at 3:24 PM  

  • Crusader, your coming to the blog is a toast to its growing popularity. I read your blog that screams `castrate feminists' and i understand your type completely. You're a chauvinist, the worst kind, and frightened out-of-your wits of women.
    Feminists are not out to get you. We are not concerned with you. All we want is equal rights for women, so that a 5-year-old girl is not gangraped and murdered, women are not tortured over dowry, and babies are not thrown out with the rest of the house’s trash.

    By the way, as a writer, I find your use of words (“Do not publish blogs to satisfy your genes”) quite, err, interesting. This sentence made me laugh. You were trying to be funny, weren’t you??

    By Blogger sc, At May 19, 2008 at 12:33 AM  

  • Dear Roop, so sorry for your loss, have sent you an email.

    Anuradha, i agree with u. My maid was telling me how they sympathized with her neighbor who had her second daughter. She explained that having a daughter was a problem for various reasons 1) the groom demands money and states that `pay up or keep ur daughter at home', 2) once she's grown up, the rogues around the area try to tease and molest them, 3) even if she's educated and earning, the money goes to the in-laws and not to her parents. So they are concerned as to who will take care of them when they're older.

    Listening to her, made me realize the sea of changes that are required in this country of ours. I hope we, at Unchaahi, can be involved in some ground work soon enough!!

    By Blogger sc, At May 19, 2008 at 12:35 AM  

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